The other day I was watching a documentary called “Jesus Camp.” The title, I feel, pretty much tells you what it’s about. Basically if follows a few kids and a church leader throughout an Evangelical, summer camp for families, geared towards creating child “soldiers for God” or “Christian wariers.” I think the films goal was to inform the audience so that they can decide whether or not this hard core indoctrination of children in the Evangelical church is a good thing, a bad thing, or neither. I won’t go into detail regarding my thoughts on all of it because it would take too long and would be better suited to it’s own blog, but I will say that after watching I was pretty much bewildered and concerned. That being said, I do recommend it, but I also suggest you watch it with someone you can discuss it with, specifically someone you trust to discuss religion with.
Okay, now on to the point ...
So I’d just watched the film and had all this God stuff roaming through my head. I mean, I was really thinking about it. I had to meet a friend for dinner so I put my shoes on and headed out, still thinking on the matter. I turn the corner to the main street, walk a few meters, and I see this fella, obviously homeless, making a bee line right for me. I think “oh, crap!,” but I am accustom to beggars so I keep walking, thinking about Jesus Camp, and planning on ignoring the guy like I usually do. But when he reaches me he says “ I am a wise man. I am knowing of God.”
I couldn’t help but giggle a little bit because, how fitting, that as I am thinking about all things religious I get a crazy guy telling me he is wise and knows God. I think it’s coincidental and funny, and I am happy that his first words to me were not “Give me money.” I say nothing and continue to walk, smiling to myself, waiting for him to get bored and leave, but he doesn’t. He continues to keep pace with me. “ I am a wise man… blah blah blah… I am a very wise man… blah blah… I am full of wisdom…. Blah blah blah… I am very knowing of god…blah blah” and then, suddenly, he says “I can make you pregnant.”
“Okay, that’s enough of that!” I think to myself and I tell him, in Amharic so there is no misunderstanding, that I’d had enough and to go away right now! I expected him to ignore me and continue to follow me, which is usually what happens, but he didn’t . He said “Okay. Thank you. Bless you. I love you” and he walked off in the opposite direction. “Whew!” I say to myself. “What a relief.”
I continue on my way, and then get to thinking about everything again. I mean, really, he could have meant “I can make you pregnant” in two very different ways. He could have meant, and this was the thought running through my head as he was following me, that he could literally, make me pregnant. Having lived in this country for almost two years, I was no stranger to random dudes wanting to plant their seed in my garden, so to speak, of course this was a natural solution to come to. But then, what if he didn’t mean it literally?
What if he meant, that he could make me spiritually pregnant? Maybe he wanted to fill me with the love of God and share all the secrets of the world with me. I mean, after all, he was a very very wise man and he was very very knowing of god. For all I know he was trying to enlighten the religion-less, heathen, ferenji girl and bring into the every loving light of the good lord and savior. For all I know he was exactly what he said he was and he wanted to make me pregnant with knowledge. I mean, it’s possible, right?
Possible, yes, but not probable. Most likely he did want to have sex with me and impregnate me with his God blessed sperm. He was obviously off his rocker. I couldn’t help but think that maybe if he’d been born in America to a wealthy family he might have been able to start a cult in which dozens of vulnerable, misguided, young women are led to believe that his seed might produce the next messiah. He wasn’t though. He was born poor in Ethiopia, and without the benefit of drugs that might set him right.
The point is, there is more than one way to look at things in the world. Sometimes the alternative to immediate judgements are less anger-inducing and more thought provoking, if not flat out comical. Beats getting pissed off about not-so-fun experiences.
